We, · Are, · Your · Friends, · You · Will · Never · Be · Alone · Again..COME · ON!

On you tube, I just saw the most disturbing video I have seen in a long time. There was this guy in some kind of liquor store who happens to be either ridiculously high or drunk and he's there to buy more beer. I find this more sad than amusing. Then my mind lingers off to my mother, who still didn't contact me yet after all these years. I firmly believe now that drinking is more destructive than smoking and it's absolutely terrifying. Not only is it expensive, it ruins people's lives and their bodies. Especially the brain.

If I can help it, I'm going to remain dedicated to avoiding all bars at every cost and I'll continue to drink very little or none at all for the rest of my life. I don't like the feeling of being buzzed or drunk anyway. It makes me sick rather than giving me the so called pleasure that other people get, even after just two. It doesn't make anything better for me- only worse. I'd rather deal with life as sober as I can so I can still do the right thing and change things.

I went to my last class today in college. Because I was feeling tired, I was toying with the idea of just staying home in bed. Instead, I chose to suck it up and go. Much to my surprise, over half the class had the same idea as I did and took the day off. It was a small turnout. I also had a test today that I still need to finish. I think I'm getting an A in english. It's funny, considering I used to have problems with comprehension and had Cs in the class in high school. I totally wasn't expecting this. Then there's math... I start that class in january and I have so much anxiety about it. It's the class I had the most trouble with and kept failing because I couldn't comprehend it at all. Then there's the abusive math teachers I've had that ruined my confidence completely. I just pray to God that I'll pass this time and not look like a complete clueless idiot that I once was. At least with the degree I'm going for, I probably won't need much math other than algebra. I consider that as a blessing. I just hope it's the same case for my prep class as well. I need at least an 80% as an overall grade to pass in order to get a real class schedule and I feel that is asking a bit much for someone like me. I'd settle for 70%.

After class today I was going to Hobby Lobby to return something and get some foliage plants for my book shelf in my bedroom instead. Or maybe get a haircut. Of course I've been feeling exceptionally tired today due to lack of sleep so I just went back to bed. Tomorrow is yet another day for that and I probably won't see my folks and Bethany until later that night. Today wasn't a bad day at all. Strangely enough I actually feel calm and even giddy, especially after writing the last entry on proposals. I wonder what it means... I feel that something is just around the corner...

um.
i pretty much hate women as a whole, but;
i must say that i have a complete love for khloé kardashian. she is easily one of the funniest, most brutal women ever. she just fucking called her sister's boyfriend a douche lord on keeping up with the kardashians. i can't stop laughing..

seriously..

DOUCHE LORD.

40 QUESTIONS FOR 2009
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I have a slight problem with firefox.

I love firefox because it easily blocks pop up ads in live journal and just about any other site there is after getting the pop up blocker. I also love it because things run smoothly and flawlessly as well. Unfortunately, I have one big problem. It doesn't let me right click. That means I can't copy and paste or I can't save things either. Is there any way to fix this? I just find it strange that it works on Google Chrome and not firefox... and I hate Google Chrome. It's very slow and it doesn't block pop ups much at all. I was sorry that I even tried it. Any feedback would be much appreciated.

*Sigh*

Ever been so jaded by the problems in life where you just feel like giving up?

 just because we had some good times doesn't mean i miss them. i've been seeing blue skies everyday. but i guess the truth of the matter is that i've been madder at you than you've been at me. i'm still bitter and you're still sweet. 

every time i get a good thing going on, every time i've had a good girl's love, keep making plans, stop showing up. no i dont really miss the late nights with the lights on. i dont still keep your picture in my car. never woke up with the pillow that you left here holding in my arms. 

i felt for sure last night that once we said goodbye, no one else will know these lonely dreams. no one else will know that part of me. i'm still driving away, and i'm sorry everyday. i won't always love these selfish things. i won't always live not stopping. no one else will have me like you do. no one else will have me, only you. you'll sit alone forever if you wait for the right time. what are you hoping for? i'm here and now i'm ready.